I’ve been delving into the classic leadership books in my library and was delighted to revisit The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever. Author Michael Bungay Stanier reminds me that, in its most elegant form, coaching is a simple, fast, and daily informal practice.
The quickest way to accelerate any coaching session is with a strong Kickstart Question . . . What’s on your mind? This powerhouse opener gives your mentee self-agency and control over the structure of the session. Now, you’re on a fast track to the heart of the conversation!
Public speakers and teachers know from experience what behavioral scientists toil for years to confirm empirically – people are more influenced by strong starts and finishes rather than the ‘middle stuff’. So it stands to reason that, in addition to a strong Kickstart Question, you need high-impact ‘closer’ that is strongly connected to how people learn. This is what Bungay Stanier calls the Learning Question. So, ask a question that causes them to reflect on what you have just learned during your 10-minute mentoring session.
Yup… just 10 minutes. You don’t need a Tony Robbins “Hour of Power” to become a high-impact mentor.
Asking a question that causes your mentee to reflect on what she’s just experienced is a powerful driver of behavior change. Better still…ask a two-part Learning Question. Here are some combination possibilities that promote reflection and self-awareness:
• What was most valuable in this conversation for you?
• Where was the ‘Aha!’ moment’?
• What do you know now that you didn’t know before?
• What are you taking away from this session?
• What should we do differently next time?
Simple. Powerful. Profound. But only when used. So what are you waiting for? Oh, and by the way, if you want to learn about the critical “middle part”, be sure to pick up a copy of The Coaching Habit. It’s the best investment of $10 you’ll ever make in your personal growth.
Here’s to your game-changing mentorship,
Cheryl
Belly of the Whale 